Counseling and How 2x2s Negate or Stop it
Counseling may start to be effective but can be negated by counsel from the professing spouse's parents or the WORKERS.
The Breakup and Promise
Your spouse may have been in a very heated argument with you and then after you leave because you cannot take it, they may call you and say "Come back, I will do anything. I will go to counseling with you."
Choosing a Cousnelor
And then you come back to the house, because they have said something that gives you hope in saving the marriage. And since they say they believe in the Bible, you find a Christian counselor, thinking that this will help (it will, but they despise Christians).
And so you both go to counseling. And your spouse says their part, and you say your part. And after a few sessions, things may get better.
And you may be able to talk about things. And you feel like you are getting somewhere. And there is a glimmer of hope, so you think. Do you dare believe a sigh of relief? Is this the reprieve you've been waiting for? How long will this last. You keep going to counseling and progress may be getting made. There may be less tension around the house. Your ulcer may be healing. Your headaches may be going away. You spend more time at the house and less at work or away.
The Tearing Apart
But then, it happens. Something totally changes their attitude towards you, the marriage and counseling. Your spouse talks to their parents, and their parents tell them to quit counseling because in effect "Who is anybody to give them counsel since they are PROFESSING"! And then your spouse quits counseling, claiming they don't need it. Or maybe it was the WORKERS. Or the WORKERS talked to your spouse's parents and told them to talk to your spouse. Whichever, whatever, it works out the same. The counseling stops.
And then your marriage quickly deteriorates again. And you in frustration, go to your computer, and type in your favorite search engine "meetings, workers, the friends" and here you are.
Why Won't Your PROFESSING Spouse Attend Counseling
Maybe you are wondering why your 2x2 spouse won't continue with counseling. Of course you are. Who wouldn't? "Did I do something wrong?", you ask yourself. "Is it me?" you wonder. You wonder if you are going crazy as you try to save your marriage. What happened? Why did they quit? You have to go back to the core beliefs of the 2x2s: homeless preachers, meetings in the home, they are the only way etc... to understand their decision making.
Simply put, 2x2s believe they are better than everyone else. They have a "special" relationship with God and you just wouldn't understand. If you don't attend MEETINGS, then they feel you are not saved. If you don't invite the WORKERS into your home, then you are not Godly, and so their reasoning goes. And since they believe they are the "chosen ones", and you aren't part of their "fold", then they don't respect you. And since they believe they are of God, and the "world" (everyone else who doesn't PROFESS) is not of God, then who is anyone to give them counsel! And so the reasoning goes.
And so, you realize, it's not you. At least not all of it. And yes, the Christian counselor that was rejected.. well now you understand why. They don't respect Christians because they don't go to their meetings. And it begins to make sense. And you wonder to yourself, "How could I have been such a fool to marry them without looking into their core beliefs?" And then you remember, "Oh yeah, they were secretive about what they believed." And this is probably because they know that you never would have married them if you knew what they really believed.
And so you call your lawyer, because, well, because, you cannot take it anymore. Your energy is drained, life has lost it's pleasure and you would rather be single than live like this anymore. And you can tell that they are no longer pleased to live with you anymore. From what you can tell, they hate your guts. And so now you have experienced one of the 2x2 core beliefs.
Married - Home|
Come to Meetings
Divorce and Remarry
|To open their eyes, and to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan unto God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins, and inheritance among them which are sanctified by faith that is in me. - Jesus Christ speaking to Saul, see Act 26:18, see Salvation through Jesus Christ.|